XOXO - 92 minutes of my life gone, evaporated into space with no potential for it re-condense into the most precious resource in all our lives.
John Wick - When average films get rated to highly.
The Flash - Time travel, because flashpoint is a good enough idea we should bollicks it in the nuts until it will breed no more, even though now its bastard children are the screaming mewling infants of incestual horror.
Luke Cage - Sometimes it takes two thirds for the proper villain to emerge, who isn't Willis.
Nerve - Unsure if expectations were set far lower than ought to or if this was genuinely good, same as life.
Lights Out - Baseline horror executed quite competently
Curse of Chucky - Sequelitus crap that needed to be executed
The Shallows - The ocean, it burns!
Ghostbuster remake - No where near as bad as the goblin said
Warcraft - Look, I've watched all these things over one weekend, I remember some green CGI?
Devil's Carnival 2 - You know how the first was amazing in loads of ways? This is exactly the same, provided you make it worse in every way
Don't Breathe - I think this was the best film of hte weekend?
To the forest of monsters our grand hero Jeordikaar did ride, and shout a mighty challenge. Alas, all the forest had to offer was a shuffling, spluttering zombie that regretted awaking in the hours of daylight. Said zombie then shuffled over and put down that most mighty of Swan casters, unless you look around for another non-Constance one.
Darius1 w/Halfjacks - 'Ol Rowdy, Gallant, Centurion, Thorn, Cyclone, 2x Sentinels, Sylyss, Strangeways
Why yes, it is a list of trash. It just happens to be my non-Stormwall jacks.
Totally should have put in the Stormwall.
Anyway, in the hands of the Noble Knight:
Magnus1 - Galleon, Freebooter, Buccaneer, Steelhead Cav, Steelhead Halberdiers, Stannis, Kell, Boomhowlers (Min)
Scenario is the Pit.
This should be alright for me, Magnus1 isn't doing much if there aren't upkeeps out, which is Gallant's perfect prey, even the armour buff doesn't stop Jackhammered Gallant popping the Galleon.
The Freebooter is a Mariner conversion, I have a dwarf fire guy as a Sylyss proxy and a random metal model in place of Arlan.
[img]https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdEMhvszd2ZiR43z253FmfPJCIqdYjMxM_k2Hlz_XbQiy4D0TQfheNr1APK8r-33tzgRfBYcndNyeQyZslhpI3lfT90s7ikSjItEoxjR2PF2MPXi36FZQkpWZUdTj1fE8Ymj7hwXN_2XBq/s1600/001+%2528800x450%2529.jpg [/img]
Merc 1: I lost the roll and got given second. The flashbacks to Mark 2 are already starting.
Pathfinder is weak in the list, so functionally I gave away the side with water hoping to make that forest and wall combo relevant for me, though either way it's a little awkward.
The Merc infantry run up on the left, the Jacks on the right.
Snipe goes on Galleon, Death Ward on the Renegade.
[img]https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0q0xX7qhpVFYDo0cDoDw61oLtFkE6721RIoQd7koenZBl3ay1jSNK3Cd4g3M8oc06mFj939mRsv7bbBr2MGmsqFlMoRUpZ23GCxlcZg1lCOQ2ru1SFfMyt5Epn9iA32LkxpeFny7XzV2W/s1600/002+%2528800x450%2529.jpg [/img]
Cygnar 1: .....and I've deployed like a fool, not setting things out to counter the opponents deployment. Both Sentinels should have gone to the right, just Darius and the Cyclone on the left.
In an ideal world there's an obstruction in the zone that the Cyclone can add his template to for maximum infantry scoffing, but in an ideal world the Cyclone isn't in the list anyway.
I left this report here for a few days lacking inspiration and just spent 5 minutes trying to work out why I played Magnus1. Not playing Mercs is clearly against my natural mental order....
Darius moves up the left, intent being to start the slow flag score next turn. The Cyclone moves up and puts down the Metalstorm wall, which will at least slow the Halberdiers, the Cav don't really care about it.
Thorn runs around the forest to be in front of Darius, as I was concerned about the Cav charging in and causing severe problems.
On the right is where the real mistakes are made. I Arc spells through Thorn before he legs it, I initially plan to put Fortify on Gallant, then get seduced by the Refuge Jackhammer plan and decide to Fortify 'Ol Rowdy and Refuge Gallant.
Gallant then runs up to be behind the wall, the other jacks tot up behind. The Centurion I move out of my control area, because genius.
[img]https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYBH9uHH_I7vMNXuRwaS4BYgxSQ0qnJhLfr9wqkxcAX9rp8ctOxOl6R9RTEUxc1IGhuXMmMJZXTUk0WL1c7fsj1gU2wDaasIL6vPtMJPNFkRnXE1jPxnAVVHuGhgRXG6s1sDFDLHwiFrhZ/s1600/003+%2528800x450%2529.jpg [/img]
Merc 2: Buccaneer knocks down Gallant, is in range of the Freebooter when it trashes a movement box, goes in and easily kills my most valuable model. Dumb on my part. Just dumb. Curse opposition competency!
Otherwise Galleon half trashes a Sentry, the infantry go in on the left and do some damage, Kell double shots Darius. Renegade knocks down the Centurion.
Magnus also feats, the jacks just futz around, one triggers Rowdy's Counter Charge, no attack but allows slightly better positioning.
[img]https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcpF5dwNQeOY7TteoRT_Us_YoUzpM89MEWK1rOiLIOphmiDS84ZorMgX_u7ZC6g-ktFzxvAvKJSyCcDAEdKmuw8Bvo1bJIOjVmDTnfpTiYL5WKm-v84lXILIY8fXWvLojATzfyFrS6hLaw/s1600/004+%2528800x450%2529.jpg [/img]
Cygnar 2: Well, there's a bunch of damage on the Sentinels and some scratch stuff on the heavies, time for the half hearted Darius feat?
Basic plan remains the same, I have to kill four cav and one halb to get the friendly score. In the meantime Rowdy pop the Freebooter and the Buccaneer.
Left side, Thorn moves across and kills one cav. This allows Darius to move to the flag, feat to repair a bunch of stuff (Halfjacks moved first), does a shot on a cav that'll hit four halbs in a beughtiful AoE. Except I miss and do nothing....
The Cyclone aims, does shots, kills one Cav.
This is going pretty bad.....
The Sentinel moves up, kills one one Cav. I couldn't clear the Halberdier, so no slow score for me.
Arlan moves into the forest and puts Elusive on Thorn.
On the right the Centurion rises and stumbles back into Control area, Rowdy vaults the wall and rolls miserably on damage, so kills the Freebooter but does sod all to the Buccaneer.
Well, this isn't going well, Rowdy is being thrown away. What I should have done is run the Sentinel in the way of the Galleon, which makes Rowdy very hard to remove and means I have the tolls to pull the right side in my favour.
[img]https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYmhxHbXR0zO-Otsofr63_dXqxfSv5BAElfdmVHSjaxZ8ASrCoBxivMkYfcTFodUSo2uCBO0rnDpTydlXAHBsZGoi1Riq7g2PDQKTnbiw4nT8n__a8KajxwGoeOQHaaNH1Y83hQnAJUOlN/s1600/005+%2528800x450%2529.jpg [/img]
Merc 3: Boomies ambush in on the left.
On the left the Boomies and the other infantry press in, the Sentinel loses its Shield arm.
On the right Galleon gets Iron Aggresion, easily kills Rowdy. Buccaneer runs to the middle of the zone, Renegade does an ineffectual stab.
[img]https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy5pd_4Z7dWMVVKE9u_gssMK-Me9M4kberlbhMpFBwA1ZKxuMzwsaZO53oODZDAPLlvf1bukSSiQWRLiVIc8YTidQaRaoxO2maxfAMET9RE1aFFMbnKyz-ykgIBP-eaO-ITKhJrgaI8xdA/s1600/006+%2528800x450%2529.jpg [/img]
Cygnar 3: I don't have a vector to kill Magnus nor the ability to clear out my flag easily, so I have to try to push attrition at the moment. Which means Galleon is a problem, I have to do as much damage this turn as possible to pop it or at least give Thorn a chance to finish it off.
To keep Boomies out of it, the Cyclone charges in and kills Greygore (Model then used as Unit Leader). Thorn stabs some Halberdiers.
Centurion goes into Galleon, stabs out most of the left side.
Darius then moves into the forest, in range of Sylyss range boost Jackhammers on the Centurion. Cast twice, enough to leave the Galleon on 13 boxes.
I'm then left in a sever dilemma. I can cast two jackhammers, on average I leave it on one box, I can camp against the now inevitable assassination attempt, or I can fortify either Darius or the Centurion.
I opt to fortify the Centurion, on average it easily survives a one armed Galleon, then I can heal the right arm and Jackhammer the Galleon down. We'll see how this goes down....
Darius Cranes Thorn forward to engage things as I apply Crane for the first time.
Arlan moves in and repairs the damage on Darius.
[img]https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDjk3fPeU2ITx5xnsWYcfO3-O2bKmr5n8pDTqLgXSTIpol-thNg_uyccnOuiTXfufcopGZoA2zOCfwXpk-WuqGG75W7EL1wI-8HLqS9OxCoe5nYbJ_CY8uTaoAqpGmSvKV3cHmHjgKHx6N/s1600/007+%2528800x450%2529.jpg [/img]
Merc 4: The Buccaneer assaults Darius for the net throw, Sentinel Shield Guards. Renegade runs around to min scatter point, Magnus throws a Scourge that sits Darius on his metal, clunky behind.
Kell, Boomies and Galleon go to shooting location. Sadly the functional side of the Colossal rolls max shots, Darius gets left on five boxes.
The Cav move, Centurion freestrikes one down, the other sadly survives Thorn's spear and kill Darius.
Mistakes aside, I think this is an awful list that needs to change. When you need your opponent to make mistakes to have good odds, you are not doing things the way they should be done. Going to cringe every time I put Gallant on the table for a while, good thing it isn't my model yet....
